Random Airport Security Checks
04.05.02

I recently took a trip to Las Vegas. My wife and I left from the local airport, transferred in Pittsburgh, and went on to Vegas. Airport security was, as expected, heightened. Not to the point of annoyance and hassle, but a bit tighter. Well, except for some of us.

I got hit with a "random inspection" after the x-ray machine at the local airport on the way out. That's what they call it. They don't search everyone's carry-ons, just random people's. So it began with simple pat down. And continued with a wave of an explosive-detecting wand in and out of my backpack. And then my wallet. And then the insides of my shoes. It wasn't too much of a deal; we weren't running late and in danger of missing the plane or anything, so I stood there and took it in stride. Hey, it's a new world here, we have to deal with M-16s and random searches at the airport.

What surprised me though was the lack of silly questions at the check-in counter. No one asked about my luggage or strangers giving me things or ANY security questions at all. Odd that the desk be so loose, but the check be so thorough.

On the way home from Vegas, I noticed someone getting one of these random searches. I also noticed he was a tall thin black man with an accent. And that when the whole idea of "profiling" entered my mind. Racial? Maybe. I do remember the last flight I took home and the random check they did on someone at the gate. He happened to be brown skinned and have a bit of a middle eastern accent. But again, this was just a "random check" right?

Then there's me. My flight home REALLY made me wonder. I made it out of Vegas without any hassle, but the transfer in Pittsburgh was a different story... yet another "random check". This was was done as I was boarding. The guy asked me to step out of line for a random screening. This one involved getting the metal detector wand all over, having my jacket and pants pockets emptied, and having my backpack THOROUGHLY searched through, including having my other wallet picked through.

After all this, I suppose I should clear something up. I'm not writing this to bitch and moan about being searched. It happens. It's a precaution. It needs to be done. And like I said, it wasn't a HUGE inconvenience, and it didn't really feel like outright harassment. It's the word that bother me... "random."

If this TRULY is random, than I should start playing roulette. Out of 50 people on that last flight, I was the only one checked. Combine that with my being screened at the first airport, and my odds are getting REALLY good. Thinking about odds and seeing who else was checked at the airports has me convinced that this just ISN'T random. This is profiling at work. And that doesn't even bother me too much. It's the word "random". I have another word for it... "bullshit."

I admit, I'm not the average looking dude. Yes, I'm white and don't have a foreign accent (unless you consider Jersey to be foreign). I'm 6"3", weigh over 300 lb., have a shaved head, two colored Van Dyke, big hoop earrings, and usually wear nail polish. So I know I stand out form the average traveler. Maybe the black guy and brown guy with the accents did too. So does it sound like profiling? I think so. So what's the problem?

The problem is another piece of bullshit the Man serves us. "Sorry sir, this is random, please step aside" becomes really insulting after the first two times. It's insulting to my intelligence. I'd much rather hear "sir, please step out of lines so we can search your shit. You don't look like the average person and it's making us kinda nervous." Or even better, how about "sir, your size, look, and demeanor fit the profile of people we're supposed to be cautious of. Please step aside." Is that REALLY so wrong. Or is it just too honest?

We're really still stuck in the Politically Correct bullshit that started long before our fear did after 9/11. Even during a period of time where we need to be cautious and suspicious, we just can't admit that there are SOME people that we need to be MORE cautious and suspicious of. Is it so wrong to acknowledge that the hijackers and terrorist that performed the 9/11 actions and MOST of those actions before that were of a certain color, from a certain region, and spoke with a certain accent? Is it a generalization? Sure. But as it was said, "all generalizations are useless, this one included." And just because something is a stereotype, doesn't mean it's not true. There is a good reason for our fear. There are good reasons for these "random searches" to be done. But these people would rather insult our intelligence and understanding than admit that we don't look or sound like everyone else around us.

On a personal level, I'd like to know WHAT it is in the profile that I fit. Maybe I can dress a little differently, carry myself a little differently, wear less nail polish maybe? Maybe there's SOMETHING I can do to avoid getting a body cavity search next time I'm within 50 feet of an airplane.

Of course, they won't admit to having a profile. And if they did, they wouldn't let out what was in it. That would be counterproductive. That would give REAL problem people a clue on how to get by without a problem.

And of course, I'll never say any of this to their faces when it happens again. Any complaints or questions from me probably will REALLY get me a BCS and a night in jail too. And then I'll really have something to complain about.